5.08.2013

I Just Really Love Parentheses

This photo is brought to you by the Anti-All-Word-Posts Foundation. Because some people out there just really hate reading. I'm here for you, illiterate generation. I kid I kid. I know you're not illiterate. Some people are just visual learners. So the above picture will "teach" you all about the joy of parentheses and exaggeration. You're welcome.

I have to preface this story by professing my love for the book The Host. Yes, it is written by the author of the Twilight series. Yes, there is a love story using lots of repetitive language of what that love feels like. (Lava, in case you are wondering.) BUT, it's an enjoyable story. So enjoyable, in fact, that it's my go-to book to read at the beach. Mindless, fun reading. If I were to exaggerate, I would tell you that I've read it seven times. But that would be a lie. Because I've read it exactly six times. Which is quite a lot for me, since I'm anti-reading/watching anything twice ever. Jason finds a show he loves and could watch it again and again. (Friday Night Lights, The OC, Seinfeld.) I prefer to watch/read something new, even if it stinks in comparison to something I've seen/read before that I could have watched/read again. The only other books I've read more than once are the Harry Potter series (before each new book came out), The Great Gatsby (because it was in my sophomore, junior, and senior year curriculums and my book club just read it last month), and A Tale of Two Cities (the greatest love story ever if you can wade your way through all of the grave-digging and French Revolution shenanigans).

All right, enough prefacing. This past weekend, Jason's sister and her husband were in town. We decided to head out to a movie on Saturday night, and since the entire world decided Iron Man 3 was worth going to on opening weekend (let's be honest, Iron Man 2 was awful. But let's be really honest, I love RDJ and I will watch anything he is in), we decided to go to The Host. On the way to the theater, I was trying to give a little background on the story. It wasn't going well. "Umm, well, it's about aliens... And there is a love story.... Well, kind of a love triangle... It's a really fun book.... Really." Skeptical though they were, my companions trusted me and off we went to wait in a crazy long line behind the IM3 attendees. We missed the previews (ugh) and sat down right as the movie began. Five minutes in I started to laugh. Atrocious. The writing. The acting. The set-up. I could feel Jason's eyes burning into the side of my face so I looked over at him. And started laughing even more. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," I said in a laugh whisper. After my eighth (That was, in fact, an exaggeration. Let's go with fifth) apology, I leaned over and said, "Let's get out of here."

The four of us ducked our way out of the theater and when we walked out, we saw that Oblivion was about to start in five minutes. Jason went to exchange our tickets and this time, we sat down right before the previews began.

Have I used up all of my prefaces for one post? Too bad. I shall preface again. I enjoy Tom Cruise but I feel like most of his movies are fairly predictable and tend to be the same ole thing. I was going to wax poetic about how groundbreaking this movie was, but now that I think about it, I guess you could say this falls in the former category. He flew a plane (Top Gun), rode a motorcycle (Mission Impossible, Knight and Day, Days of Thunder), had a hot leading lady (all of them?), and solved a futuristic mystery (Minority Report). But the plane was awesome, and the motorcycle was collapsible, the leading lady was especially gorgeous, and the futuristic mystery was a really good one. So Tom gets two thumbs up from me.

So the moral of this story is... don't sit through a bad movie because it's really easy to exchange your tickets or get your money back. Or maybe it's... sometimes, previews lie. Or possibly... don't marry a guy who hates popcorn, because it will make all of your movie going experiences a little less fun.

10 comments:

  1. Haha I love this! I also liked The Host, but if the movies are anything like the Twilight movies, it's definitely NOT on my to-see list. I'd rather go for IM3 or Great Gatsby.

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  2. Haha now I can tell myself that don't bear the movie. You can exchange the tickets anytime!

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  3. Haven't read the book, but I do love the Twilight series...this one just didn't really interest me.

    We did, however, see Iron Man 3...and I'm also an avid RDJ fan, so obviously, I loved it!! =)

    xo,
    Katie
    hellolittlebean.com

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  4. With little shame, I really enjoyed the Twilight books. BUT the movies... so awful. Thus, I'm not too surprised that The Host is bad but I'm glad to know before I spend any money on seeing it.

    The Brayn of Chalayn

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  5. I felt that way during that one Rachel Bilson movie - Jumper! Oh God, it was so horrible... but Iron Man 3 was amazing & I really want to go see Place Beyond the Pines!

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  6. I love iron man 3! Actually I love all of the iron man movies, tony stark is the best. ;)

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  7. You are the epitome of hyperbole. This blog inspires me to read A Tale of Two Cities (as I have already seen Ironman 3)

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  8. I havn't read the Twilight books, but am addicted to the series! Love for you to check ut my blog xx

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  9. I have read The Host 3 times. It really is the perfect beach book. I hated the movie as much as you. I laughed. I didn't get to leave though, because I went with a girlfriend and I didn't want to make her leave. (In the end, I found out she hated it as much as I did). Love your blog. :)

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  10. I also am a Host fan! However....I DID sit through the movie. Because of my loyalty to the book. ^_^

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