9.26.2009

glimmer

they told me i would have trust issues. i always said i wouldn’t have issues with trusting men, just issues with trusting one. i trusted one with my heart. and it was broken. the heart. the trust.

i don’t know if i have trust issues, but i’m definitely having issues. i was always a relationship kind of girl. it’s my comfort zone, my happy place. i like feeling that surety of having someone. someone who will be there for me, someone that i can give my attention and affection to.

i've been single for awhile now. and i must say i’m really not a fan. i’d like to not be single, but this is where the issues come in. there needs to be a guy for there to be a relationship. and i don’t have me one of those. and i don’t know how this whole system works.

i like a guy who doesn’t know i exist. what do i do. i like spending time with a guy but don’t know if i want to date him. what do i do. i like a guy who sees me as just a friend. what do i do. i don’t want to go on a date with that guy. what do i do. i want to go on a date with that guy. what do i do. cause seriously folks, i simply don’t have these answers.


i’m lost. and i’m just waiting for it to be easy. can it just be easy and make sense. that would be nice. and while i’m asking the universe for an intervention of easy love, can i also ask for one for claire and linds while you’re at it. cause it would be mighty nice if we were all dating and happy and just had the whole kit and caboodle.
it would just be swell.



p.s. two things not worth mentioning: i wrote this at 2:40 am; and i wrote it in a word document, which went through and auto capitalized a bunch of words....so i went through and one by one uncapitalized them. ocd much?

p.p.s. in response to claire's comment and other possible confusion- those all may or may not be hypothetical situations.
(paper tissue)

3 comments:

  1. if i were a boy, i'd date you all. just remember- camille was originally a boys name...

    aaand i can totally relate to the capitalization thing.

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  2. wait.. who do you like who likes you just as a friend? wha?? also, i appreciate the plea to the universe in my behalf. YA!

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  3. i was gonna say the exact same things as claire.

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